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  • Making the plan :) please help me

    Hello everyone.
    I posted a thread awhile back and dudbt receive much support or advice so I continued to abuse my suboxone prescription. I recently got married and have always wanted to be a mother! I REFUSE to bring a child into this world while still on this junk. Not judging anyone who has children while on subs I just want to remove it from my life before trying to conceive/ for my own beliefs and reasoning. I'm prescribed 12mg a day but I take anywhere from 16-30mg depending on my mood that day :/ I know aweful. Your probably wondering how I dont run out? I do run out every month and spend $200+ a month on extras.. I'm so sick of this and want to stop this madness! I've been reading posts here for hours now and saw roberts taper 25% reduction .. I'm going to start tomorrow getting stable at my prescribed dose of 12mg and work off that! Any advice or support is greatly appreciated I've been doing this for 7years mind you so this is not going to be an easy task but I'm determined and have hope from all of you that this can happen for me and I can finally become a mom!!
    Jenn

  • #2
    Hi Jenn,

    Welcome back! Glad to see you want off the Sub train. I just completed my taper last month. Including the time it took to taper off, I was on Sub for almost 8 years. So, it's totally possible to get off this junk after long term use.

    If you've been taking between 16-30 mg per day, you'll probably need to stabilize at a dose higher than 12 mg. Your body is used to much higher doses, so you'll need to figure out "where" you're stable. How long have you been taking 16-30 mg?

    Also, since you've been on Sub for 7 years, you need to taper much slower than every 4 days. The "every 4 day" rule is for people who are new to Sub or have only been on it for a short time. I had to wait 2 weeks between every reduction. I know that it will make your taper longer, but it's the only way to be comfortable while tapering. I'm not saying you'll need 2 weeks like me. At first, it'll be trial and error, so to speak. Once you're stable at your starting dose (whatever that may be), you can make your first 25% reduction and see how long it takes you to stabilize again.

    You can do this! A proper taper takes time and patience. Glad to see you back!
    Kat

    Comment


    • #3
      In all honesty you could reduce your dose to 8mg beginning tomorrow and you wouldn't even notice the difference. If you think you do is gonna be a mental thing with your brain messing with you. Get completely stable for at LEAST 4 days on the 8mg dose as per Robert's plan then reduce by 25% nd keep repeating that process until you're down to around .25mg or so.

      Seven years is a long time on subs so take your time, it's no race at this point. If you follow the plan you should get off with minimal symptoms. The time will go faster than you think and you will have plenty of support here to keep you going.

      Get a bank and put that extra $200 in it each month and before you know it you will have a nice tidy sum built up to get yourself a nice reward. If you want to start at 12mg that's perfectly ok too. Up to you to take that first step by reducing the dose. You can do this!

      Comment


      • #4
        Randy suggested dropping to 8 mg immediately. While I agree that 8 mg is a high dose and you may be able to stabilize there, you also may not. If you can, that's great! The reason I suggested trying to stabilize at a higher dose is because you've got a hell of a lot of Sub built up in your system from taking up to 30 mgs.

        Do what you feel you can handle. If you wanna try to stabilize at 8 or 12, go for it! The worst thing that could happen is that you don't feel well and need to increase it a little. No biggie.

        We're here to help! Talk soon.
        Kat

        Comment


        • #5
          I agree with randy that you should try 8mg. It may not be enough right now depending on how often you're going 16+mg, but try 8 in the morning and see how you feel for a few hours, you can always take more if you start to get sick. Tapering down isn't fun, but it's totally doable. You just need to be mentally prepared to not get high and only stay well. Thats how I did it and now I'm on the end of day 4 with no subs. Good luck and be strong

          Comment


          • #6
            Thank you all very much for the replys. I was reading posts for hours before posting and now I'm so grateful I did. Make no mistake that 'junk' thou has significantly made my life better over these 7yrs. I work 2 jobs while going to college for my nursing degree & just had the wedding of my dreams to the man of my dreams. I was a hopeless dope fiend felon who dropped out of high school in 9th grade. This all came to light recently when my husband (who is on subs too- weaning off 1-2mg) suggested we both get off before having children. Then I go to my normal sub appt today and my dr said your very stable & have a busy life maybe you should start weaning before you get pregoo. The signs were all there and the willingness that came over me today was inspiring! although my life is stable through subs & the NA program I've beeb abusing them way too long honestly it does nothing to me when I take more - I take more until I feel a numbness / I know its all in my head it's sad. I have not been on a stable dose in over 5yrs - I take random doses daily. My goal is to this week get at a stable dose of prob 12mg because my head will convince me otherwise prob. I'm prescribed 12mg so ill going to try just 12mg for the next 3days and see what happens ? IM not going to tell my dr yet because I fear they'll cut my dose and I need to feel I can do this first- having what I have- I filled my script today!!
            You guys have given me hope in just your short postings that I can do this and you guys will be here to support me through this! This is huge for me - I've been comfortable with how I've been living up until now. I want more though thank you guys. I'm going to bed now - sorry for the ramble I'm just excited about what the future may hold!
            I'm going to start 12mg ONLY tomorrow I'll let u know how it goes!!!
            Xoxo
            Jenn

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by J_addict View Post
              Thank you all very much for the replys. I was reading posts for hours before posting and now I'm so grateful I did. Make no mistake that 'junk' thou has significantly made my life better over these 7yrs. I work 2 jobs while going to college for my nursing degree & just had the wedding of my dreams to the man of my dreams. I was a hopeless dope fiend felon who dropped out of high school in 9th grade. This all came to light recently when my husband (who is on subs too- weaning off 1-2mg) suggested we both get off before having children. Then I go to my normal sub appt today and my dr said your very stable & have a busy life maybe you should start weaning before you get pregoo. The signs were all there and the willingness that came over me today was inspiring! although my life is stable through subs & the NA program I've beeb abusing them way too long honestly it does nothing to me when I take more - I take more until I feel a numbness / I know its all in my head it's sad. I have not been on a stable dose in over 5yrs - I take random doses daily. My goal is to this week get at a stable dose of prob 12mg because my head will convince me otherwise prob. I'm prescribed 12mg so ill going to try just 12mg for the next 3days and see what happens ? IM not going to tell my dr yet because I fear they'll cut my dose and I need to feel I can do this first- having what I have- I filled my script today!!
              You guys have given me hope in just your short postings that I can do this and you guys will be here to support me through this! This is huge for me - I've been comfortable with how I've been living up until now. I want more though thank you guys. I'm going to bed now - sorry for the ramble I'm just excited about what the future may hold!
              I'm going to start 12mg ONLY tomorrow I'll let u know how it goes!!!
              Xoxo
              Jenn
              Hey Jenn...

              Sounds like a plan! Give yourself at least 4 full days to see how you feel. Sub has a crazy long half-life, so if problems/symptoms are going to crop up, it won't happen right away. Hopefully, there won't be any symptoms!

              Glad you're on board. I'll check in with you tomorrow.
              Kat

              Comment


              • #8
                Jenn - Glad to hear you want to get off the sub after so long. Just an FYI for you and Kat, but the reason I suggested you could reduce to 8mgs without any problems is the fact you HAVE been taking such high doses for so long that you have one HUGE build up of sub in your system. You could probably go days without taking any sub and be ok, but don't do that. Just wanted to explain my suggestion a little further.

                Your plan to ONLY take 12 mg per day is great! Try to take it at the same time each day to keep a steady amount of bupe in you system at all times. Your head is gonna mess with you at first wanting you to take more as you usually have been doing. Stay strong and fight back any urges to take more.

                Like Kat suggested - give it a full 4 days on the 12 mg and see how you feel. If you feel good and are stable then reduce by 25% like the plan suggests which would make the next dose 9mg per day. Then it's only a matter of repeating the process and you'll be down to tiny doses before you know it!! Be proud of yourself for taking the first step!!! Good job!!!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Hello. A few months ago I was just like you and was taking way more than I needed, between 16-20 mg a day, at random times when I would feel like >>>> I would just take more. I also would run out early at times and stress out over "am I going to be able to find more?", etc. I am prescribed 8 mg a day but I was getting am extra 30+ pills a month from another source. Well that source was abruptly cut off a few months ago so I had no choice but to seip down to 8 mg a day- over a 50% drop from what I was used to taking on most days, and I have to tell you IT WAS NOT THAT BAD and I honestly hardly felt a thing and I even felt BETTER on the lower dose. I had my mind convinced for so long that I needed the higher doses and when I didn't have that much to take, I thought it was then end of the world which was so not true and just my addict mind playing games. After I realized I was not going to die because I didn't have my huge dose of sub, I decided to taper off once and for all. The pros of tapering off, far outweigh the cons for me at this point. I've been on 6 yrs. I'm down to 5 mg a day now and feel fine. It's a mental battle and you have to psych yourself up for it and convince yourself you will be so much better off without it. Take care!
                  ~Kris~

                  Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Hi guys thank you for all your advice & incouragement. Oddly enough I take my dose at night well late afternoon, so I'm about to try to take the only 12mg today without convincing myself I need more. I'm also going to start leaving them at home- I usually carry them with me so I tend to take them whenever I feel. Mostly none other reason then to take more/ chasing something that isn't even there. When I got up this morning I felt alil anxiety knowing today I would take the prescribed dose which I've never taken correctly. You are so right though I need to pych myself up to do this because I can already hear my disease trying to convince me this isn't a good idea. I feel let you all know how I feel later after a few hours of dosing.
                    Randy- you mentioned how I prob could skip a few days having that much in my system. Weird thing is - because I've been on it for so many years (never missed a day ever!) my body knows it like clockwork - come 3-4pm I start getting anxious and the yawns with watery eyes? Not sure if that's possible but my body seems to know exactly 24hrs and wants more. Weird. I mean I've never tried with the minimal effects as soon as I yawn I dose so? I'm interested to see what is going to happen! I'll keep you guys posted- thanks a bunch!
                    Xoxo
                    Jenn

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      So I did it! Woot Woot! I only took the 12mg yesterday around 3pm. It was tuff though my head was doing for a good 5hrs, didn't sleep that well, and woke up kind of weak. But def nothing I can't handle I'm going to do it again today & over the weekend with 12mg to really get regulated on a set dose in my body since it's not use to this. Monday I'm going to start on 8mg. Wish me luck
                      Ps I had class last night & left them at home which helped huge. I kept busy and by the time I got home I had forgotten about it

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Hey there...

                        Just checking in. How's it going? Hope you had a good day.
                        Kat

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Welcome
                          I used to do that with the methadone I was on .. It cost me hundreds of dollars extra every month..
                          I follow ksin's thread and Kat's too..
                          Please join us we are all in this together..
                          Kat already off 30+ days and she has great tips ,.
                          She said " just take your dose and forget it". What a concept
                          I take my vitamins 1 time a day and don't think about them again till the next day..

                          So that is my suggestion for you too.. Take it and forget about it..
                          Maybe put it will any other meds you take 1 time a day.
                          It is definitely mental and the lower the dose the more mental it becomes.
                          Sub is a strange drug..
                          Less is more..
                          Congratulations on your decision!
                          Take care
                          Will talk to you later,

                          Iluv

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Congrats on your choice to taper off subs!! It can feel like a long road but very doable and so rewarding in the end!! Today is my 34th day off subs after around 6 years on them and over 4 years of abusing hard drugs before that and I feel pretty great and I truly believe that my spending almost a year tapering down to .25 mg played a big role in the final jump not being as terrible as I had imagined it to be. The mental battle is half the challenge but it's amazing how we find strength when we need it most! I never thought I'd see this day and for me this has been one of the biggest accomplishments so far in my life. I also wanted to get off the subs before having children one day as a personal goal and hope of mine and I feel very proud of myself. I do get some cravings still here and there but they never overpower my desire to stay free of this stuff so far Like Kat and Randy said, take your time with the taper as there is no rush to the finish line. Slow and steady always wins the race right!

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                            • #15
                              Hi there J

                              How are you doing?
                              Please drop in and let us know..
                              Talk to you soon,
                              Iluv2

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